Helplessness
by Seiren Mina Hoshijo
Summary: A college groupie that knows nothing but depressing natures in life. A beaten and abused high schooler that wants to escape. How can someone HELP you when they don't even understand where you're coming from? Coming across and meeting wasn't the cry for help they were expecting.
1. Chapter 1

A college groupie. That's the only thing that could describe someone like him. He was in his last year of college, and the only thing that he did was drink and fight. No one cared, so why should he? He wanted out of his shell. This…this cage that kept him trapped. His dark hair fluttered over his eyes, as he looked down at the lush green grass below him. Why is he even trying anymore? Giving up sounded so much easier. The sliver dagger was twirled in between his fingers. Rain poured over his hair and clothes soaking him. The grass was wet with drops of rain, rolling down its blades into the ground to create more grass. He stopped twirling the dagger. He always hated rain. It made everything depressing, and wet, and miserable. Even if sound effects or a light show didn't show up this time, it still made him sad. He looked over at the silver blade as drops rolled off of it and into the grass. Twirling it once more, he held it above his neck. His eyes were empty as he plunged it into what he thought was heading to his throat. He looked up blankly at the arm that was around his neck, the sleeve that covered it was now slowly filling with blood that dripped on his rain dropped shirt.

"We both know that isn't the way." The rough voice muttered in his ear. He didn't reply as the dagger was removed from his hand, and watched as the person wrapped his arm, with a ripped cloth.

"…" he said nothing, looking at his long time high school friend. He watched as the young adult wrap his arm tightly; then bent down to eyelevel placing the dagger in the back of his pants. He looked away ashamed of what he just thought about doing. "I'm sorry…" he muttered.

The young adult sat in the damp grass next to his friend. He looked up at the crying sky as drops fell on his face and rolled down his glasses. "We all have a point in life where we want to do it…having someone there to stop is can either be good or bad." He placed a hand on his friend's wet shoulder. "I'm glad I was here to stop you." He gave a light smile.

He didn't smile back as he kept his eyes on the grass. Everything seemed like it was crying…why couldn't he? He had so much emotion, so much pain that he wants to shed, but it doesn't come out. Was he just a robot that needed new batteries? If not, then that's what he felt like.

* * *

"Scream for me! Scream dammit! Scream!"

He was being ripped. Metal tore through his arm and leg, the blade tearing at the muscle, veins, and bone. He was covered in blood as the chainsaw roared in his ears, splattering his bright red blood across the room, on him, his foster mother and father. What had he done to deserve this? Why must it be him? What did he ever do wrong to anyone? Nothing. He had done nothing to no one. Was this some kind of plan for him to pass? If so, he was failing, as he held his breath when the blade went for his leg. He didn't know if he was in pain from his arm or the new pain that surged into his leg. He chewed on his tongue, cheek and lip that even his mouth was coated in the taste of iron. He looked over at his younger brother whose eyes were twice as wide as his. No…close your eyes. Please don't look at this. He would not scream. He would not let his brother see him in pain. However, that thought was changed when the blade slowly dug in his bone; he let out a painful scream.

"Yes! Yes! More! louder! Ahaha!"

Someone help him. More blood covered him and he couldn't help but notice the speck of blood that slowly made its way to his brother. Everything was in slow motion, the roaring of the chainsaw was now quiet, the pain in his leg and arm was now numb…the speck of blood landed on his brother's cheek and all he could hear was the screams.

* * *

Roy Mustang didn't feel like going to any classes today. No. It was raining pretty hard, and while he lay in his bed looking into the bleaks of nothingness he couldn't help but want to get up and walk around outside. There had to be a place…a place where it was nice and warm out…where the sun shinned every day. As if someone was reading his mind, there was a knock on his small apartment's door. He looked at his bedroom door, wanting to know how did that person enter in his front door without him knowing. There was a knock again and he waited for the other person to leave…they never left. Instead they opened the bedroom door slowly.

"Roy?" a soft female voice asked. He stared at the person who walked into his room, closing his door and making her way towards him. Riza Hawkeye. Another high school friend. Her and Maes Hughes were the only two people he could trust…now they were in college and Maes was engaged to some woman…he had time to gloat about her, but in the back of Roy's mind, he knew Maes still cared for him. Riza, was nearly closer to him than Maes. She knows twice as much about him, and yet he only met her in his sophomore year in high school. "Maes told me to get you away." She said, sitting on the edge of the bed, her long blonde hair was kept up in a pin. "I think so too…let's get away from the city. I have an aunt and cousin who lives out in the country—not too far from here—but it'll be more than enough."

Roy only blinked. Maes knew his every thought, every action, everything…even when he was around his fiancée. Roy let out a heavy sigh, as he sat up. "Okay." Was all he said…off to the country they go.

* * *

Edward Elric laid in a white bed that was in a room filled with instruments. His arms and legs were no longer there, the joy in his eyes…no longer there, his loud mouth now quiet, his tanned skin now pale…he heard his younger brother, Alphonse Elric, cry softly at the edge of his bed. No. Alphonse shouldn't be crying for him. He was the one hurt…Alphonse had to sit and watch his horror, his pain. Why Alphonse? Why are you crying? He wanted to sit up and pat the younger's head, but he couldn't. his body was strapped to many tubes and wires—his face was covered in a clear mask. He was fine. He was alive. Where was he? He glanced around. Oh, that's right. He's at Lady Pinako's house…his foster parents were arrested and trialed for death. Serves them bastards right for letting his brother see his pain. There was a knock on the door.

"Ed? Are you alright?" the soft female voice asked. Winry Rockabell. She could be violent at times, even throwing wrenches at his head…but she meant well. She, as Alphonse, had blood shot eyes as well. She had been crying. Why were they crying for him? He was alive wasn't he? He couldn't reply to her answer, not because of the clear mask, but because he lost his ability to speak. His throat was raw from the screaming, and he wondered if he would be able to talk every again. That wasn't the only problem…would he be able to walk as well? He would have to learn how to write again…the list goes on and on. She pulled up a chair and they both looked as Alphonse sniffed and whipped his face. "I'm having my cousin come by here…" she said softly. "She said her and her friend needs to get out of the city for a while. I hope that isn't a problem."

Edward shook his head, and she gave a light smile. Alphonse sniffed again. "How long are they staying?" he asked whipping his tear streaked face and snotty running nose on his sleeve. Edward looked at Winry.

"For about a week or two." Came the short reply. Nothing else was said as Edward looked at the ceiling…why would they need to get out of the city? It seemed much safer there than the country…at least people could hear you scream./

A/N: Sooo~ here is my newest Ed/Roy fanfic...ummmm I'm sorry if the chapter is short or anything. I have no idea what's making me write a depressing fanfic but i just felt that all of them were too happy or too happy ending so i wanted to try something new. neh? As for updates they will be late due to me being in college and they give you soooo much work that it makes me want to quit. BUT I will not! Thank you for reading and enjoy my newest Ed/Roy fanfic.


	2. Chapter 2

Roy looked blankly at the small yellow house they pulled up at. Nothing but sunshine, lush green grass, and fields for miles. Why did it make him feel at ease? He stepped out of the car and walked with Riza to the house, where the door was opened. He did nothing but glance at the sign. It was no use to him, so he didn't read it. He looked at the old woman that stood before them. She had a pipe dangling from her mouth, her faded grey and purple hair pulled up into a pointy ponytail, and all...she was short. Her name was Pinako. A relative of Riza's as well…as the blonde girl that walked up beside the old woman. Her name was Winry, and by the looks of it, she'd been crying. She had on a plastered smile, but it did nothing to hide her bloodshot eyes. When they stepped inside, the walls were green? No…yellow…wait…Roy couldn't decide. There was also a boy sitting at the kitchen table, his head buried in his hands. He looked when he heard the sound of visitors, his light brown hair matched his hazel eyes…but they too were blood shot. His name was Alphonse.

"Have they been crying?" Riza asked Pinako when the old woman had directed them towards their room. Roy began unpacking his things, placing his clothes in a near closet as he heard the old woman sigh. The country seemed so lively, why would these people be depressed? He was the one depressed. He had nothing to live for…no one cared about him, no one loved him…the city was a wide place full of people yet he was so empty. What would these people have to make them depressed?

"They're upset and worried about Edward." The old lady stated looking at her pipe sadly.

"You mean Alphonse's older brother?" Riza asked, she too wondered what made these bunch of people so depressed.

"You know them?" Roy asked, glancing over at his friend.

Riza nodded. "They're best friends of Winry…lived down the street from what I remember."

Pinako blew out smoke she had sucked in from her pipe. She twisted it again before sucking in another long drag. Roy scoffed. His parents were too stuck up to even notice that he existed after his teen years. Pinako let out the long drag she had taken earlier. "That was ages ago, dear. Their mother died—their father left—all that was left was for them to be sent to the orphanage." She chewed on the edge of the pipe. "I tried everything I could to gain them, but they were soon adopted by this husband and wife, who couldn't have a child."

"So, by them crying I guess that the parents died as well." Roy muttered. Their life wasn't too bad. Parents died…or left…it was life.

"You could say that." Pinako retorted as she tapped at the end of her pipe, emptying the ashes that had collected inside of it. "They—"

"Granny Pinako…"

Three heads turned to the boy standing at the door. His head was down, his fists were clenched…when he looked up, and his face was dripping with wetness. Salty tears ran down from the hazel blood shot eyes, and he did everything in his power to choke back the sob that was arising in his throat. "Ed won't…." He began and choked again.

"What is it child?" Pinako asked calmly. She knew she wouldn't gain anything if she panicked. Roy and Riza looked as well.

"He won't open—his eyes!" He finally cried out. He turned and ran back down the hallway, as Pinako followed him. Roy and Riza looked at each other and followed as well.

Beeping of machines filled their ears as they steadily got closer to the room. They would hear the rush quiet orders from Pinako and many instruments being moved around. Roy turned the corner to look inside and there he saw a boy. No, a teen, strapped to wires and tubes. His long golden hair was pooled around him and over the pillow, his eyes were closed, and his skin was pale. A blanket was pulled up to his chest as Pinako, Winry, Alphonse and now Riza helped. Was he—was he dying? Roy walked over to the boy. His mouth was slightly ajar from what he could tell under the mask, his cheek bones were sunken and everything about him looked…_alive_. Seeing this boy…Roy couldn't help but want to know his reason of giving up. He looked like he had so much to live for—so much that he had yet to accomplish, someone like Roy. Roy soon found himself shaking and checking the boy for his heart. This teen…this stranger he didn't even know—why was he helping? He wanted to die as well…why help this teen? Was it because Roy felt like he had a connection? Was it because Roy felt as if he knew where this teen was coming from? If so, then…

"Open your eyes, dammit!" Roy nearly screamed.

* * *

It was peaceful. Nothing but white surrounded him, as he floated. Where am I? Ed wondered. He blinked when he heard beeping and shouting. What is that? The while void slowly changed into Pinako's health ward. The people below him shouting and hooking more instruments to his body. Is that…me? Yes, it was him. He was lying in the white bed, Pinako, Winry, and Alphonse surrounded him. Who were the other two people? The woman was shouting about his heart monitor and the man was shaking his limp—lifeless—body ordering him to open his eyes. Am I dying? Their faces were full of worry, pain, and sadness. He didn't want to leave this place. It felt warm, it felt peaceful, and it made him tingle. He wrapped his arms around his naked body. Wait…arms? He looked. Yes, he had both his arms and legs. He looked down at his lifeless body that only had one each. Where were his arms? Oh, that's right. Those bastards sawed them off. Are they crying? Ed looked at the faces that had tears streaming down them. Winry, Pinako…even Alphonse. That's right. He couldn't die…his brother…he needed to protect Alphonse! How would he get back? He unwrapped his arms away from his torso and looked around. How would he get back? He felt even fuzzier; he looked down. He was fading. No…nonononono! Alphonse! He called out. His younger brother kept crying…the group doing nothing to help him. Nothing to save his body. Alphonse! He shouted, his lower half now completely dissolved…he needed to reach his brother….

* * *

Roy looked away as the beeping of the heart monitor got slower and slower—the long green lines slowly becoming straighter. He heard the others cry, but he wouldn't. He didn't know the kid…he just wanted to save him. It would only drive him more into his depression if he had just gotten attached to the kid and he's dying. Roy looked at the youngest one who had his arms wrapped tightly around the pale older brother's neck. He was sobbing into his neck, clenching tightly to the body. It only pained Roy. To catch sight of those who you loved die right in front of you…it was painful. It was something no one should ever see. He looked over the boy. His breathing mask was now removed and his long golden hair was pooled out over the pillow, in which the youngest—Alphonse—buried himself in; not wanting to lose touch, scent, or sight of his elder. Roy glanced over at the heart monitor…only one beep filled the room, and he felt a tugging on his arm. It was Riza. She was tugging him out of the room and he noticed that Winry and Pinako left as well. They wanted to give the younger brother the time he needed with his elder. Taking another glance at the heart monitor and both boys Roy stepped out of the room.

They were seated in the living room. Riza had stepped outside with Winry for air and more silent tears. Pinako was looking over a newspaper, but her eyes never moved off a page as a few tears of her own escaped her eyes. Roy sat at the kitchen table, hearing nothing but the faint beeps and the choked sobs of Alphonse floating from the room down the hall. He had fixed himself a cup of coffee, but it remained untouched, where he was staring into blank oblivion. His mouth was dry as he reached out for the cup, but it fell. He blinked out his state of mind and looked at the shattered coffee cup that was on the floor. The dark brown liquid filled the floor and around the shatters. He grabbed a few napkins and bent down the clean up the mess. It was still silent. He picked up the last shard of glass and shivered when a cold air ran through his body. He looked around. It was warm outside, and the windows were open letting in the warm summer breeze. Not overthinking it, Roy tossed the shards of coffee cup and stained napkins into the trash to fix another cup. He pulled down a plastic one but that fell to the floor as well. It bounced, until it rolled back to his feet. He bent down and picked it up feeling the cold air pass through him again.

_"Help me."_

Roy froze from straightening back up. What was that? He looked around but it was still silent. Placing the cup on the counter he stared at it. It may have sounded stupid but he placed it at towards the wall on the counter. Not too long after the same saying was said again and the cup flew off the counter and onto the floor.

_"I need to stay alive….help me."_

Roy quickly ran to the boy's health room. He froze and wrapped his arms around his body. It was freezing…and smelt like death. He looked at Alphonse who was curled up next to his elder, his arms around the small pale waist as he slept. It was sad. Roy looked at the heart monitor the heart beats gradually fading away.

_"Help me."_

Roy looked around quickly for the instruments. It had to be the older brother. He was trying to tell them he was still alive. He saw the small machines next to the bed, pushing Alphonse off the bed, he turned on the small things **(I forget what they're called)**, rubbed them together like he'd seen Pinako do and place it on the boy. The boy's body lifted but his heartbeat stayed the same. Roy turned up the voltage more earning a confused look from the younger brother who just realized he was knocked off the bed. Roy charged the small devices again and shocked the boy once more. The boy's boy lifted, and there was a slight increase in heart rate before dropping back down again. The college student gritted his teeth as he upped the voltage once more and charging.

"Stop it! What are you doing to brother?!" Alphonse shouted as he grabbed Roy's arm before he could place the devices on the elder's chest.

"I'm saving him!" Roy shouted. If the older brother didn't pull thorough this…

"Why can't you leave him to die in peace?!"

"Dammit! He's not dead yet!" Roy snatched his arm away and placed the devices on the elder's chest. The boy lifted and soon the heart rate slowly picked up. It went from one beep…to two, then three and four. Roy sighed as he cut off the device and slumped against the wall. He's just saved a boy's life he didn't even know…what the hell happened and why did he fell all….why did it feel like he accomplished something? There was that cold feeling again as he heard the same voice.

_"Thank you."/_

A/N: Yay! The second chapter! Thank you all for your alerts and reviews and favorites! I'm sooo happy! But...i has to go now...homework calls me. Damn college professors. =.=


	3. Chapter 3

~three days later~

"Lady Pinako! Winry! Miss Riza! Mr. Roy! He's awake!"

Roy was shaken out of his light nap as Alphonse's cheerful shouts echoed throughout the house. He turned over on the couch deciding that it would be best to see the elder brother later…

* * *

Edward laid back in the bed, looking out the window where the clouds cleared up after an evening shower. He was attacked with hugs, kisses, gifts, punches, and joyful tears when he opened his eyes. He had been asleep for three days he was told, and near death, when a college student named Roy Mustang decided to give him one last chance of survival. He had not met this Roy, but he had seen him when he was watching his body die away. He was the one who could only get his attention by knocking a single coffee cup over. Edward had not told the others about him trying to get in contact with Roy or Alphonse for that matter, and assuming that he wasn't asked questions when he awoken, neither had Roy. Why had he connected with this young adult, whom he'd never met before? Was it because Edward knew that they were just alike? Edward jumped out of his thoughts when there was a light tap on the door.

"Come in." he said, his voice was still a little raspy due from not speaking. The door opened and it was when Edward sucked in a silent sharp breath. Unwavering coal black eyes met his golden ones, the skin was a milky pale, and the jet black hair was tossed to the side. During his state of panic, he didn't take time to take in the details of this Roy Mustang, but now—now was a different story.

Roy looked at the teen that was lying in the white bed. His long golden hair was pulled back into a tight braid and tied at the end, his once closed eyes were now warm and golden, and his once pale skin was a medium shade of tan what complemented well with his hair and eyes. This was the teen he'd saved. This was Edward Elric. Quite a looker might he add. Roy pulled over a chair and sat at the end of the bed. Not breaking gaze of those golden eyes.

No words were said between the two as they stared into each other's eyes. Edward finally broke eye contact and looked back out the window. "Thank you." He said, looking for the stars.

Edward's voice wasn't too high. It wasn't too deep either. It was just right. Roy looked at the gifts that sat on a near table. "You're welcome." He muttered.

Roy's voice was rich and deep. It took all of Edward's will power not to turn around; instead he kept looking for the stars. It was addicting. Silence fell upon them again, when Edward opened his mouth once again. "What do you do?" he asked, glancing over quickly.

"Pardon?" Roy asked looking over at Edward who kept looking out the window.

"I heard you're a college student." Edward rephrased. "What are you majoring in?"

Roy leaned back into the chair he was sitting in. "I'm not really sure yet…but I'm thinking about going to the military."

Edward looked over. "That's what I was thinking about too."

"You're in high school, correct?" Roy asked.

Edward nodded. "Last year. How about you?"

"Last year in college, yes." Roy crossed his legs and rested his head against the wall. "It's just so…stressful and depressing."

Edward blinked. "How so?"

Roy couldn't believe he was telling this to a high school student who just woken up from death, but there was something about this Edward Elric that he felt as if he could trust. It was as if…they already had a connection—something that he'd never had before. "I just have been feeling like I'm worthless." Roy muttered. "It's like…no one is out there for me. I mean the city is great and full of interesting people, but I just feel alone…"

"You're not alone." Roy's head quickly shot up to look at the teen who was looking out the window once again. "There is someone out there just like you…wondering the same thing. If they should die, if they will ever be accepted, will they ever find 'the one'? If you give up now…how would you find the one that is looking for you? Ate night parties and one night stands aren't all just about college…it's about finding out who you are and accepting it with all the pains and hurts with it." Edward turned and met the shocked young adult's face and smiled. "After all, we all want to die at some point in our life right? Why not wait until we find 'the one' to see if we will be able to be by their side…to grow old and die with, eh?"

Roy looked away from the golden eyes, who gave a light smile. He couldn't believe that—that this teen was able to read him like a book. Riza and Maes only gave him advice about not killing himself but Edward…he just not flat out told him not to, but gave him a reason to keep on living. He was right. There was someone out there for him…he wouldn't just have to wait or go out and find them. He gave a light smile as well. "Yeah." He nodded.

"Brother?" there was a knock on the door. The two guys in the room watched as the door opened and Alphonse walked in carrying a tray. "Are you able to eat?"

"Eat?!" Edward shouted. Roy jumped…this-this kid had such a gentle voice just a second ago…what the hell?! "Man, am I starving! I was wondering when you would bring me food!"

Alphonse laughed as he sat the tray in his elder brother's lap. "I'm sorry…, here let me adjust the bed for you. Sit up some." Edward leaned forward as he felt the bed slowly rise up to where he could eat without lying down.

Roy watched as the two brothers talked and while Edward ate, he couldn't help but notice that he only ate with one hand. "Do you always do that?" he asked voicing his thoughts.

"Scarf down food, yeah." Edward said chomping down a piece of bread. He made a face as Alphonse urged him to drink milk.

Roy shook his head. "Eat with one hand."

The spoon that was being used to sip broth of some soup was dropped. Silence filled the suddenly happy room that was now a hazardous area. Edward didn't reply as he pushed the tray of food away, and Alphonse gave the half eaten food a worried glance then looking at his brother. His eyes filled with hot angry tears as he glared at Roy, who gave him a confused look. Roy feared to swallow; his dry mouth wouldn't allow him with the sudden quietness from Edward and the angry glares and tears from Alphonse.

"Get out." Alphonse whispered.

"Huh?" Roy asked stupidly, and ducked when the tray of food was thrown at his head. It clattered against the near wall and slid to the ground. The sound of breaking glass and spilling liquids filled the room

"Get out!" Alphonse shouted, his tears were angry; his brown eyes were cold and glaring. Giving Edward one last glance, he walked out of the room and closed the door. Alphonse threw himself into his brother's bed, hugging and crying silently. Edward would never be the same again…two of his limbs were missing-and now-he just sat there with a blank look on his face shaking. Alphonse hugged his brother tighter…all they had, were each other.

* * *

A/N: ahh~! yay! another chapter! ughhhhh! i'm apologizing ahead of time today cause i have a feeling the next future chapters will b smaller. I shold really get to my homework, but i try to put it off as much as possible. slacking in college really isn't helping me.


	4. Chapter 4

Roy Mustang walked out of the bright yellow house. Did he do something wrong? No. he asked a question. Was it a touchy subject? Assuming that the tray wasn't thrown at him for no reason, then yes. Yes it was a touchy subject. Sulking at his own stupidity he walked down the stone driveway…his mind in another place as he walked past barbed wire fences, farms with cattle, pig, sheep, chicken and dog. Children ran past them, with smiling happy faces without a care in the world, farmers that saw him waved and he nodded while waving as well. The countryside—Roy thinks as he stops, looking around. The bright yellow house was now far behind him sitting on a hill. Everything was so peaceful, not loud, carefree and friendly. The city….it was nothing compared to this. The city it was loud, crowed, rude, and uptight. What made him move there in the first place? Oh, that's right…college. Maybe there's a college around here? Maybe he could transfer and become a farm boy. He wouldn't have to wake to no loud noises, just the sun rising and setting.

"You there! Boy!"

Roy stops when he heard a voice calling him in his direction. He looks around for a moment to make sure it was him. Of course it was him, he was the only one walking in the road. He walks up to the man. "Yes?" he asks. The man had jet black hair with streaks of grey…a mustache going across his upper lip. His face was muscular and angled, and his skin was a dark reddish brown. "Yes?" Roy asked.

"Come help me lift this hay." The man motioned towards the barrel of hay. Roy paled. He wasn't even sure if 30 men could lift it, much less them two. The man was built, but Roy could see the ages of ageing seeping in.

"Um…"Roy said unsure. "Shouldn't we need more people?" he asked as he ducked under the barbed wire. "It looks kinda heavy."

The old man just laughed. "You lack faith son! Now get on the other side and lift when I count to three."

Roy walked to the other side. "I'm ready." He called, not sure if the man could hear him.

"Ready? One—three!"

* * *

Alphonse shifted away from his elder brother. His light brown eyes now blood shot, due to crying. It wasn't Edward's fault that he now only had to eat with one arm. It wasn't Edward's fault that he now only had to walk with one leg. It was those peoples. Those bastards of foster parents. Why would they do something so cruel? That's life. Something wanted him to believe that it was normal to get beaten by your parents. Something wanted him believe that it was normal to suffer some stupid fate that one sets for the other. But that was ridiculous. Nothing like that happened. Why did it feel like he had become the older brother? Was it because he was less traumatized than Edward? No…then what was it?

"Al…" a horse response came.

Alphonse quickly ran to the caller. "Brother! Are you alright? Do you hurt anywhere?"

Edward shook his head. "I'm fine." The elder brother sat up, wincing slightly as he done so.

"How is the sheet staying around you?" Alphonse asked when he noticed the sheet that was covering Edward had not fallen off.

"Winry, attached some pins to the bandages…she said that I shouldn't see my arm just yet." Edward looked down as to where his arm might have been. "Where's Roy?" he asked.

"I sent him off." Alphonse huffed, crossing his arms as he sat beside his brother.

Ed gave a small chuckle. "You didn't have to do that."

"Brother, you don't understand! You didn't see your reaction when he asked about you eating! You look so…so…not yourself!"

Edward leaned over and patted his younger brother's shoulder. "I will always be myself."

* * *

"Military, eh?" the old man asked as he and Roy sipped on some lemonade. Roy nodded as he looked across the country side. " I was in the military for 16 years."

Roy looked over at the old man. "Really? What happened?"

"It was about 5 years ago we were fighting off troops from the east….The eastern rebellion was a nasty one, I tell ya. All them bloody savages of U.S.S.R were tryin' ta invade our counry! Of course, them bloody Brits were no good either. Each were fighting for land, wanting to gain the upper hand, but for years it seemed like the war was getting nowhere. Isn't that what they called it? Doesn't matter. Anyway, we were surrounded by both sides. We had them Russians on the left and them stinkin' Brits on the right. Them Americans, I'll tell you what, them fat lazy suckers were sittin' back watchin' it all happen. Wouldn't even lift a finger…sayin' they wanted to stay neutral or some shit. Oohhhwee! Boy, you don't know how hard I wanted to skin 'em!" the old man laughed.

Roy gave out a small laugh as well. He didn't know if the man was telling the truth or just plum crazy. He looked back at the setting sun and gave a dreaded sigh. He didn't want to go back to the bright yellow house that was filled with life. Then again…maybe that's what he needed. He drowned his lemonade and thanked the old man.

"No problem, boy. Come back here tomorrow and I'll set up some more work for ya!"

"Yes sir." He nodded.

"What? I can't hear you!"

"I said 'Yes sir'!" Roy shouted.

The old man smiled. "name's Bradley. Retired Fuhrer Bradley."

"I'm Roy Mustang."

The old man waved him off. "I'll see you tomorrow at lunch then, Mr. Mustang."

Roy nodded once more, before heading back to the bright yellow house. For now, it seemed as if nothing could damper his mood./

A/N: Another chapter up and ready! Sorry if it's short, but I already told you guys the other chapter's were pre-written. this...not so much. yay! I'm so exicted that so many has liked my story! i feel as if i could jump off a tree with happiness being-yeah never mind. But anyway, thank you all for reading and before i forget...i will try to update at least once a month. so, I'll see you all in the new year!


	5. Chapter 5

"Brother you need to eat." Alphonse protested. The now, lukewarm soup that was held in his hands was steadily becoming cold, despite the warm summer night's breeze sweeping through the window. Edward had not said anything since the college student named, Roy, left. Alphonse held out a spoon full of the liquid. "here." He said, holding it to his brother's mouth. After all, he was the one who threw the elder's meal at the student, but he had a significant reason. His older brother was hurt and it was his duty as the younger brother to help his older brother restore himself. He held the spoon closer to Edward's mouth, only to have the mouth turn away, looking out the night window. Alphonse glared, snatching the spoon back and standing up abruptly, once again, making Edward's meal fall to the floor with a loud 'crash'. "Fine! I don't care anymore! You can starve for all I care!" he shouted and ran out the room, where Riza was bringing up some fresh basin of hot water and towels.

She knocked on the door lightly, although it was open from Alphonse's sudden outburst. "Ed?" she asked before coming in. "I brought some water and fresh towels for you…to you know—wash up." She set the basin and towels on the small table. He made no acknowledgement for it; although she wasn't expecting one. Dipping one, towel, in the water, she held it out for him. He made no movement, to take the towel—it was as if he were in a trace, off in his own world. Inwardly sighing, she stepped past the spill soup to Edward and turned his face toward her. His golden eyes were dull and hazed over as she ran the towel over his face.

Feeling the contact of a warm towel over his face he blinked out of his horrid memories and looked into the dark honey eyes of the female student. "Riza." He rasped. Giving him a gentle smile, she finished wiping his neck and proceeded to his ears and chest. She dipped the towel in the water once more before getting ready to peel back the blanket in which his chest held. It was tightly bound, unlike the rest of the sheets around the small teen. A weak but firm hand stopped her. "No…I can do the rest myself." He stated softly.

She nodded lightly before pulling back and handing the towel to him. Announcing her leave, she pulled the door to a close, reminding herself that she didn't even think about cleaning up the spilled dinner. She walked down the hallway to see the younger one, Alphonse, grumbling to himself about having a stubborn older brother. She gave a small smile inwardly. _Sibling troubles, eh?_ She questioned herself. _Much like Roy and I…_Ignoring the curses and grumbles, she walked past the teen to the kitchen where she saw Roy was just returning. "You're back?" she asked, confused. "Where'd you go?"

Roy removed his shoes before lying down on the bright green couch. "I went for a walk and got asked for help. I have to go back tomorrow." He muttered the reply cracking a few of his joints. He watched as she walked to the sink to prepare a glass of iced water for him. He mumbled a quick 'thanks' before downing the clear tasteless liquid. The old man that helped, had stated that he was an old military dog. Yet, he said it with such harsh humor, Roy questioned if the man was sane. He looked down at the empty glass that contained melting ice cubes. What if he became part of the water cycle? He shook his head to rid himself of any of those thoughts. Instead, he asked Riza about Edward.

"It seems like he and his younger brother had a small fight." She replied, sitting beside him. She could hear the light inhale and exhale Roy did along with the sound of a light breeze, and  
Den barking in the background. It was so peaceful here; it was as if nothing but happiness and joy were all that the country and country people lived for. She shook her head. No. Everyone has troubles no matter how petty and small they might be. She just wondered if the country people were keen into hiding it more that city folk. Riza mentally shuttered. 'Folk'. She needed to return to the city fast, before her vocabulary becomes anymore hazardous.

"A fight huh?" Roy questioned. As far as he knew, fights were common with siblings—well, as long as they weren't ripping each other's limbs off for bloodshed. Although, there were cases as such, but none that he actually could remember.

The two young adults looked up at the front door opening. "Oh! I must have the wrong place." An elder woman stated. She was tall, almost as tall as Riza. Almost.

Riza stood up. "No, are you looking for someone?" she asked. "I'm just here with my friend, we're visiting some family." The woman gave a light laugh and behind her, from what Riza could see, was her husband, who grunted. He looked like someone she knew back at the college…who was it? Umm…

"Okay." The woman said. "I'm just here to pick up two of my sons." She stated.

Roy cocked an eyebrow, seeing no relation between the two teens and the couple at the door, but his opinion remained in his head. Riza blinked. "Sons? You mean Al and Ed?"

The woman nodded eagerly. "Yes! Oh, thank you so much! I have been looking for those two _brats _since they ran away from home a few days ago." Behind her the two young adults heard another grunt from the lady's husband.

Roy couldn't help but notice her strained word on 'brats'. Something wasn't right. He stood up, brushing off imaginary dust. "I'll go tell them, you're here. Riza, fix some tea and invite them in." It wasn't his house, but he was sure that Pinako wouldn't mind. Speaking of which, he hadn't seen her nor Winry. Were they out? From the corner of his eye, he saw Riza move aside to let the couple inside. Walking down the hallway, he stopped at the brother's shared room, and knocked. "Al?" he asked, before opening the door. He saw the teen sitting on the floor looking over a book.

"Hm?" Alphonse asked, not lifting his head as he turned the page.

"You're parents are here to pick up you and Ed." Roy stated. No sooner as 'parent's' left his mouth, the book was dropped to the floor. "Al?" he asked, wondering why the boy had reacted so suddenly. He heard the teen mumble something but had asked him to repeat it once again.

"Why are they here?!" Alphonse screamed. His body was lit up in slight trembles, but they weren't so slight. Roy could see the boy trying to wrap his mind around why his parents were there.

"They—" Roy started but he blinked and the room was empty. The younger brother had run out the room. He sighed as he made his way to Edward's room to see the door already open. He stopped at the doorway, leaning against the frame, wondering what had the two brothers so riled up.

Alphonse kept repeating: "It's okay brother, we'll leave. Don't worry. It's okay. We'll be safe." But Roy had noticed is that the older brother made no movement. If he did the movement was damn near invisible. He watched as Alphonse gather up some things in a small backpack, throwing it on his back, and hurriedly gather his frail brother. "Brother, you have to help me here. I know you as sure in hell don't wanna go back there, so help me out!" Alphonse whispered harshly.

Roy didn't hear what the younger brother said, but it snapped Edward back to the world of the living. Watching the two brother get adjusted to the weight of each other, Alphonse glared at Roy. "Do _not_ tell them what happened to us." He hissed.

Sighing to himself, for getting caught up in something he knew he shouldn't have, Roy gave a small nod as he watched them disappear out the window. He stood there longer than he should have, listening to nothing in particular. Pretending to be worried, Roy ran out the room, back to where the two parents were sitting and having light conversation with Riza. "They're gone!" he all but shouted. He noticed the worried glance Riza passed his way, and went straight into thought. No doubt, questioning his motives. He saw the two parents talk harshly and quietly to themselves.

"When I get my hands on them, I'll murder them!" he heard the wife say to no one no other than herself. The husband only gave a short grunt, before she turned to Roy. Plastering on the fake-st smile, Roy had ever seen in his life, she said: "Thank you so much for the tea! We must be taking our leave!" standing up and running out the door.

Riza stood up and saw the two run off in the distance, before she turned and glared at Roy. Crossing one arm over another, she spat the only word that was on her mind. "Explain."

Roy blinked at her sudden command. "Excuse me?" he questioned as he made his way back to the kitchen.

"Ed and Al were there not too long ago, and it seems as if you let the escape…"Riza muttered picking up the used tea cups and bringing them to the kitchen.

Roy made no movement to reply, but when he did, it wasn't what she was expecting. "There's something going on…" he turned and looked at her while she busied herself with washing the few dishes that were in the sink as well as the tea cups. "…it looks more than what those two boys can handle."

Riza only nodded in agreement./

A/N: Hi guys! Happy new year! As promised you got a monthly update from me! In the previous chapter please note that I meant no harm with what Bradley said. I live in the US and hear wayyyyy worse things than what i wrote. I apologize if I did ofend anyone or took it the wrong way. I hope to see you all in the next chapter next month. Lots of love!


	6. Chapter 6

Alphonse pulled Edward over into the woods where he sat the both of them down for a much needed break. Catching his breath, he looked over to his older brother who was still giving slight huffs of his own. _I don't understand._ Alphonse thought as he looked at the darkened sky. _Shouldn't they be in jail? They were sentenced to death weren't they? Weren't they!?_ He shook off the remaining thoughts and took another glance over at his brother. He could see the specks of blood seeping thought his cloth wrapped limbs. _Damn!_ Alphonse didn't think to pack bandages. He rubbed his hair in frustration. _I'm the younger brother!_ He screamed inside his head. _I shouldn't have this much responsibility!_ He heard Edward groan and pushed his selfishness aside to ask him what was wrong.

"It hurts…" Edward groaned.

Alphonse gave a panicked look. "What hurts?" he didn't have any meds on him, nor bandages, nor anything to help his brother out. Could there not be any other time he ever felt so useless?! Oh wait….there was.

Edward gave a sharp glare followed by a hiss of pain. "What e-else dammit?!"

"Don't get pissed at me!" Alphonse nearly shouted.

"S-Shut your d-damn mouth!" Edward hissed out. "You k-know just as well as I d-do if they hear us, they'll d-damn us to hell!"

Alphonse's mouth snapped shut. He didn't want any more drama than what he already has. Then again, it wouldn't matter. He just about seen everything horrid thing in his short life time, why in the hell would it matter if there were a few more? He tisked. Because he didn't know how much more his mind would take, that's why. Once again, he glanced over to his elder. The white cloths that were wrapped around his missing limbs were growing even darker; even Edward's face was losing the tanned color he always had, his eyes were steadily growing glassy. _He's losing too much blood!_ Alphonse cried in his head. He leaned over and shook Edward's shoulder. "Brother?" he whispered, making sure his voice remained low. There was nothing but a drop of Edward's head that Alphonse began to panic. "Brother?" he tried again a little louder, shaking the boy's limp body. "Brother open your eyes!" Alphonse shook Edward while looking around for help that wouldn't come. He felt tears sing the corners of his eyes as he earned no response. His brother couldn't die…he just couldn't….A snap of a twig made Alphonse's head snap up. He heard voices. Loud ones at that. He knew these voices and the curses that were spat along with it. Carefully, he drew Edward's unconscious body into a protective hug, and in his mind tried to make them as small as possible. Reality being herself, didn't let them off that easy.

"Ah~ so this is where you two were." A sigh was let out as a large rough had snatched Alphonse from his brother. He did not let out a single cry but a small whimper from being separated from his brother. He was turned to face the face of his adoptive father. He watched from the corner of his eye as his 'mother' walked over to Edward's limp form. She picked him up by his long golden braid, before turning to Alphonse with the most shit-eating grin he'd ever seen. "Dinner time is coming soon, why don't you two come over…?"

* * *

"We're back!"

Roy and Riza turned both their heads from sitting in the kitchen when the front door was opened and closed. Riza announced to him that she would be back in a moment but Roy was in his mind, doubting. I_t was the right choice wasn't it? They were their parents_. He shook his head and tightened his grip around the cup his hands occupied. _Of course it was!_ He nodded to himself and blinked out of his thoughts when something in the front room dropped and break. Leaving his cup where it was, he made his way to the living room where Winry gave him a look of shame, pity, but most of all anger. Her hands gripped the bottom of her pants so tightly; Roy could see the whites of her knuckles.

"Why?" she barely let the shaky breath before fully glaring at him. "Why didn't you make them stay here?!" she screamed.

"Winry, calm down!" the old woman, Pinako, said lightly touching the teens arm only to have her hand pushed away.

"What the hell's wrong with you?!" she screamed at Pinako. "to have then run off with them _bastards_ chasing after them and you tell me to calm down?! I wonder if you even ca-" a slap echoed though out the room as well as the silence of the teens words. Her hand slowly rose to her stinging face as he looked thought teary eyes at the older woman.

"I will not have you talk that kind of way in this house." "Pinako stated, more like an order. "You know just as well as I do that panicking during a time like this will get us NO where." Winry looked away in shame. "and if you ever mention that I don't care for those boys, as well as you, ever again—I will see it personally that you will not be able to sit for a month! Do I make myself clear?!"

"Yes ma'am." Winry muttered.

The old woman pulled out her pipe and lit it. "Now, we will do what we've always done—and that is to wait."

* * *

Screams. That was all that filled his ears as he slowly arose. His was in pain. His missing limb filled his body with an alerting pain. _Alphonse…_was his immediate thought as he quickly opened his eyes. His brother! Where was his little brother!? Another scream filled his ears as he sat up. He was in the basement. No…more like hidden room that no one ever knew of. He cursed himself. What kind of older brother was he? Passing out on his younger sibling—it disgusted him. He looked around as he noticed three figures in the room. Of course, it was _those_ bastards and then…

"Al!" he shouted. Alphonse was lying on the table. That cold metal table that they had used to cut both his limbs off. Alphonse was covered in blood. Not just any blood. It was Alphonse's own, slowly dripping off the table and making its way to him. There was no sign of the younger getting up, moving, or even breathing for that matter. "….Al…?" Edward called softly.

"Oh? He's awake!"

Edward flicked his gaze over to the two adults in the room. He didn't respond when the 'father' made his way over to him. He was scared—not afraid was more like it. He could see the bloody foot prints move and smear across the cement floor. Something inside of his head told him that his brother was dead but he shook off any possible thoughts. _Alphonse isn't dead. No…he's just…just_. He was thrown, landing in the dark warm liquid. _Blood—so much blood._

"I thought maybe you wanted to _see_ your brother…" came the sadistic comment.

Edward couldn't hear them. His eyes were locked on brown dull ones. "…Al…?" he choked out. His numbs of arm and leg were screaming in protest. He ignored them, and touched the side of his bothers face. Cold…it was so cold. This isn't right! Alphonse is supposed be warm! He could hear the cold chuckles and snickers behind him. "…Al?" he shook the bloody body. "Al—wake up! Al!" He never noticed it before, but he looked at his younger brother's body. His stomach was shredded, internal organs hanging over the table, ribs cracked, an un-beating heart punctured, sawed limbs lying here and there. Blood….so much blood….He shook the body again. "Alphonse! Answer me dammit!" Nothing—nothing but the sick chuckles that filled the silent room.

"It seemed he wasn't hungry, so we let him have desert." The sickly sweet voice chuckled.

Edward pushed himself up to the table, his missing limbs and his present, staining his body with the dark liquid that seemed to be everywhere now. He patted his younger siblings matted hair, crawled up into a ball, and laid his golden braid upon the opened chest. He never did cry, scream, or anything. He just laid there with his brother until he heard the door open and close—signaling that he was alone with his brother. _They will pay._ He thought bitterly. _They will pay…/_

A/N: yay~! Here's the monthly update! I'm sorry about Alphonse. TT^TT he will forever be missed. Oh, and happy early valentines day! I know this isn't the romantic chapter, but...close enough right? isn't V-day all about red? well...there's plenty of blood! I'm so mean. college is killing me, i have a 10 page paper to write then i have another one on top of that! i really thing they try their best to get us to drop out...oh well, you all next month!


	7. Chapter 7

Roy lay in the bed that night. He couldn't sleep. He counted sheep, tossed and turned, but nothing seemed to close his eyes. Finally, he decided to sit up. Something was eating away at his conscious. Did it have something to do with those boys? He shook his head. No, that was impossible. They were safe with their parents. Parents are supposed to protect and love their children. For some reason, he was overwhelmed by depression. His parents didn't love him like Alphonse's and Edward's parents. No—his could care less. He felt anger towards the two young boys. Their parents loved them. His didn't. Roy buried his face into his hands. Why did others have it easier than him?! He had no father! His mother was a bitch! It was just so—"Arugh!" Roy roared into his pillow, before throwing it at nothing. He was alone in this world, with no one to love him! Why was his life so frustrating! His eyes stung, but nothing came out of them. No one loved him…that's right. He was alone in this world—no one to live for—he should just give up…

* * *

"Whoa! Talk 'bout somethin' that jus' came from war!" The retired man laughed.

Roy looked at him blankly. The sun was just coming over the hills giving it that soft purple-ish glow. The birds were happily singing their morning songs, everyone smiled and waved his way, everything was just perfect and it made him sick to his stomach. There was nothing that happened in this small country town. Everything was just so fucking perfect that Roy doubled over and spilled his breakfast.

Bradley jumped back after watching the young adult. Something was wrong with this kid, besides him spilling every content on the earth in front of him. "Yo, you a'ight?" he asked. His hard southern accent made Roy dry heave. He placed a hand on the boy's back; rubbing small circles. He looked up at the now rising sun. "ya know—" he started. "The world ain't as bad as we think it is." He smiled when Roy looked up at him with a questioning glance. "It's us humans who make it so damn difficult. If ya stop e'ry once and a while an' listen. You'll notice."

Roy wiped his mouth on the back of his sleeve. "I don't understand what you mean." He muttered. He honestly didn't. The accent only made things harder to understand.

Bradley slapped his back hard enough to make Roy lunge forward. "Ya'll city folk don't understand a damn thing! Always in a hurry to get to some place knowin' it ain't goin' nowhere!" the old man roared. "Stop doing what yer doin' for a minute! Look around you!" he thrusted his arms out. "Take time out for yerself! An' I don't mean go to them lavish spas or whatnot, I mean go to a quiet place. Lay in a patch of soft grass and look up at the sky." Roy looked at the sky to see the soft clouds float by. The sun was now almost fully into the sky but everything was peaceful. "Don't think of anythin'. Don't question anythin'. Jus' look an' relax."

Roy looked back at Bradley. "I still don't understand your point." He said finally. He jumped when the tanned rough hands clamped down on either side of his shoulders. Feeling the force he felt as if Earth's gravity was pushing him down. He stared into the pitch black eye of the retired military officer.

"You ain't the only one with problems." Came the rough reply. "Stop actin' like it's the en' of the world."

* * *

Edward slowly peeled his eyes open. He was cold. Wet and cold. Wet…and…cold. Edward shot up looking around. He came to realize that what the thought was a dream was real. Alphonse was dead. Cold and dead lying right next to him. His now pale eyes stared lifelessly back at him, and Edward couldn't get himself to move his one good arm to close those eyes. It was as if—as if it was _his_ fault. He shook his head quickly. No! It was not his fault! He stopped shaking his head and looked back at Alphonse again. It was his fault. He was the elder brother. He was supposed to protect the younger one. No—he had passed out due to his weakness and Alphonse had paid for it. He leaned over his brother pressing his head to the cold chest. He should join Alphonse. They would be together and be happy in that for off land that he knew probably didn't exist. He clenched his fist. He shouldn't be happy! This was his fault! HIS! _No Edward._ He thought. _You need to stay alive for Alphonse._ It sounded so much easier in his head. Nothing in life was ever easy; but he knew he needed to live for Alphonse's sake. Sitting up once more, he looked down at his brother.

"I promise—" his voice cracked. "I _will_ make this right."

He hovered his hand over his brother's dull eyes and willed them shut. He gave his brother one last hug before scooting himself off of the table that was still drenched in red liquid. Getting used to the balance on his left leg he hoped over to near book cases and weapons. Nothing—nothing in his house should survive. He destroyed everything in his sight. Creaming curses to their 'parents' and whoever else he could think of. He made his way to the ascending stairs, looking over the damage he'd done. His eyes finally laid on his brother once more. He whispered a soft good-bye as if the boy was sleeping, but he knew better than that. One by one he hoped up the stairs and out of the basement door. He looked around the small house that he and Alphonse had lived in. this was supposed to be home. Home is where the heart is. He scoffed at that thought. There was no heart here. There was no home here. There nothing here. He made his way to the kitchen, going over to the stove and turning on the gas. He held his breath as he found the small pack of matches—right next to the gas can. He knew what he would do and he prayed to whomever that Alphonse would forgive him of not being able to give him a proper burial. Placing the matches in his mouth, he threw the remaining gas around, making sure that it covered the basement, stairs, rooms, kitchen—everywhere. He made it lead outside and onto the drive way; tossing the can away, he pulled the matches out of his mouth and looked at where the trail of gas led right to his foot at the end of the driveway. He gave Alphonse another silent apology as he lit the match and tossed it to the ground./

A/N: Uaawwaaa! Hey guys! I'm sooooooooooooooo so so so so SO sorry about last month! This is all I got for now and the next chapter might be up in a few weeks. This chapter is only up because i didn't update last month, you guys better be glad you get two chapters in one month. XD Just to let you know, I did finish my paper and now I'm waiting to get it back so i can see my grade. My speech went wonderfully well, and now i have to work on the next one. i have a mid-term next week, and all that other boring college stuff that I'm pretty sure you don't wanna hear about. Sooooo, hopefully I'll see you in a few weeks!


	8. Chapter 8

"Grand—" Winry whispered as she looked off in the distance. There was a black cloud rising from the distance of Edward's and Alphonse's house used to be. "Grandma.." she whispered, knowing that the old woman wouldn't hear her. "Grandma!" she yelled, running inside the house from the cream colored balcony. "Grandma! Grandma!" she yelled, running from room to room in search of the feeble on woman that sits and smokes from her pipe. "Grandma! Where are you?! Grandma!" Winry turned the corner to run into her cousin that was looking at her curiously. Winry, shook away the spur of the moment. "Riza! Where's Grandma?!"

The older blonde blinked. "She's in the back. Why—" Riza didn't finish her sentence as the younger blonde ran outside to the backyard.

"Grandma!" she yelled, running up to the old woman who was sitting against a tree flipping through a book.

Pinako looked up from her book at her granddaughter running and almost crash landing into her. "Goodness child, what is wrong with you?" the woman demanded, as the teen caught her breath.

"Ed's…and…. Al's house—" she breathed.

"Yes, child, what is it?"

"It's on fire!" she nearly cried, frantically jumping up and pacing around the old woman. "I-I mean are they hurt?! Are they dead?! What do we do?!" Winry threw her hands into her hair, messing it up in frustration. "Oh dear skies please don't let them be dead!" she shrieked.

Pinako sighed at her lost peace. "Winry," she stated calmly. The teen looked back at her grandmother, about to lash out of how calm she was during moments such as these. "all we can do is wait."

"But that's what we ALWAYS do, grandma!" Winry cried. "Waiting will only last us for so long!"

"Then what do you propose we do then?" the old woman asked calmly again. Winry didn't reply. They couldn't do anything. The house was too far away, those people were a living nightmare—she…she couldn't do a thing! She sank to the ground beside her grandmother, crying softly. "Exactly." The woman said in a hushed whisper. "exactly."

* * *

Edward leaned against a tree, trying to catch his breath. He was still a long way away from Pinako's house. Hobbling on one leg and having one arm doesn't really help him that much. He wanted to turn his head to look back at the house that was still burning. No. he was not one to look back. He had no regrets. None at all. None…but—what about Alphonse? Edward laid his head next against the tree and looked up at the semi-cloudy sky. Alphonse was his only friend. His only family. What was he to do now? His brother had so much to live for, dammit! He wanted to become a scientist and study nature! How's that gonna help the world, if he was dead?! Edward closed his eyes harshly to keep the tears from falling. No. Crying is for the weak. He had to be strong! Strong for Alphonse! He had to live for both of them! But he was weak. He wasn't strong enough to stop those bastards. He wasn't strong enough to save Alphonse. He wasn't strong enough to save himself. He was missing an arm. He was missing a leg. His body was filled with physical, emotional and mental scars. He had Alphonse's dried bloody caked to his body, and it did nothing to make him feel better. Edward slowly opened his eyes to see a cloud cover the sun. What was he to do?

* * *

"You're home early." Riza stated as she turned to see her best friend. "Did he not need help?" she knew about his recent outings with the old man Roy had come across and honestly, she thought it did more good for Roy than the old man.

Roy walked to the nearest couch and threw himself on it. "He says that I'm the one who needs the help." He muttered into a throw pillow. _Okay, so that wasn't what he exactly said, but it was damn near close. _ Roy thought. He wanted to go back to the city. Everything here was making him feel weird. He hated it.

Riza gave a small smile, walking into the kitchen to make him something cool to drink. "I think that old man might be right." she says giving a small laugh to lighten the mood.

Roy grunted in response, placing his arms over his eyes. Everything.

…

He assumed he must have fallen asleep because he was jolted awake with the front door slamming open, panicked cries, and loud voices filled his ears. He groaned sitting up. Napping on the couch wasn't the best of his ideas, but he looked around to see what had woken him up. Edward. He was home—but it wasn't what Roy was expecting. The young blonde teen was covered in mud. Leaves, mud, stray sticks, and blood. So—so much blood. He was missing two of his limbs. Two. Roy shot up from the couch as his friend and her relative helped the tired teen to the couch. His braid was slowly becoming undone, his skin was a sickly pale as Pinako shouted orders to the girls to get medical supplies, Roy swallowed hard as the teen opened his eyes. They were…

"Ed, Edward boy listen to me." Pinako said in a calm worried voice. The teen grunted as reality hit him. The pain. It was supposed to be numb—this. This is what he gets for leaving his brother. This is what he gets for being so weak. This—this is hell. "Ed, I need you to stay awake. You've lost too much blood too—Ed, stay with me." She slapped his cheek a few times. "Ed where's Al?"

Edward cracked open his eyes to look at the old woman that was too wise for her age. He loved her. Pinako, Winry, Riza, even the one named Roy; but he loved Alphonse most. His brother, his own flesh and blood was killed by those, those…things! Edward clenched a fist despite Pinako's requests of 'Where is Alphonse?'. They should've died in the fire like Alphonse. No. They didn't deserve that kind of mercy. They don't deserve any because of what they did to his baby brother. He ignored Pinako's requests to keep his eyes open. They were just so heavy…/

A/N: hiiiiii people! I know I know short chapter, don't lecture me about it now. ahaha. Sooooo my exams are ALMOST finished! i gots one more and im done with my first year of college! yay~! So, as of May 9th with mark the end of the spring sesmester of meh and the start of summer vacation! Buuuuuuuuttttttt, reality sucks and i have to work so it's not really a vacation its more like grow up. I have to start doing this and that, its like ughhhhhh. Those of you who aren't in college and don't have a job, be a kid while you CAN! I'm gonna be 19 in two months and im still being a kid. ahh~ im just weird like that. So, time for updates! my profile is updated so PLEASE CHECK IT OUT if you ever wanna contact me or something. Mothers day is sunday, so make sure you TRY to do something nice for your mom or gardian (i still have to find something for mine...maybe i'll send her to the spa or somehting). I can't spell to save my life so please forgive me and not double spacing this cause of...yeahhhhhh i'm gonna go study for my last exam. Buh-byes! (until next month)

()()


	9. Chapter 9

"Hey!" Roy shouted when he saw the young teen's eye drop close. "Hey! Heyheyheyhey!" he now held a panic to his voice as he slapped the paled cheek none too lightly. "Wake up! Don't close your eyes on me!" on him. On anyone in this dammed room. If Roy wasn't allowed to die, then neither would this kid. He was pushed to the side as the women took over in taking care of the boy; Roy stood at the side hoping to the skies that he would be alright. He would, wouldn't he? He had so much fire in his eyes—speaking of which, didn't Winry state that their home was on fire? If, that was the case, did Alphonse not make it? Did he die in the fire? Something happened—and Roy wasn't just talking about the fire. The boy that lay in front of him, as the women worked around, was missing two of his limbs. Why was that? Did he get into an accident? All these questions worked around Roy, and yet…none of them were answered.

* * *

"What happened to him?" Riza asked as a cup of teaming tea as set in front of her. Edward was resting now, after once again, being pulled away from deaths' door. Roy wondered the same thing, even if he didn't know the boy as long as Riza did. He watched as Winry sat beside her grandmother after the tea was served. He watched as the old woman took a deep inhale of her pipe and slowly exhaled letting the smoke filter to and from her lungs. It held a sickly smell just like the sickly feeling in Roy's stomach.

"Cut 'em off." She stated simply and Riza dropped her tea. Winry quickly jumped up to clean up the mess her cousin had made.

"What do you mean?" Roy asked, trying to figure out the meaning of her statement.

Pinako took another long inhale of her smoke and held it in for several moments before letting it out and looking at Roy. "His parents," She stated all too calmly. "cut them off."

"Holy hell." Riza breathed. "I knew it!" she called. "I knew something was wrong with them sick bastards the moment I opened that damned door!"

Roy nearly rolled his eyes. Of course she didn't say anything. The thing that got him was…. "Why did they do it?" Pinako took another deep inhale of her pipe and blew it towards Roy's direction. He fanned away the second hand smoke, and looked into the dark eyes of the old woman.

"Imagine this," she said instead and Roy cleared his head instantly ready for what she would say. "because you want to."

The young adult lifted his eyebrow and said: "excuse me?"

"You like to feel the blood on your hands. Warm and never ending flow. You like—no, love to hear the screams and cries of those beneath you. You make them feel like they're no more than a piece of sand ready to be stepped on. Then they cry out and scream of mercy it gives you this high, and you only want more. More, more, more, more. So you keep on and on and on until it no longer has the affect you want, so now you do it just to do it; trying to get that high feeling again that you will never feel anymore." Pinako took a inhale of her pipe as she let her words settle into the college students minds. She watched as Roy excused himself to the bathroom, and not long after heard him emptying his stomach. She looked as Riza was shaking in fear, rage, and another emotion that can't be yet described. Winry only looked at the floor, no doubt shedding silent tears. Pinako exhaled her smoke that she had held in her lungs way past its time. "It's just the way the world works." She muttered to no one but herself.

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

It was morning. Shinning sun, singing birds, clear-less blue sky, and the way Roy felt didn't match the morning at all. He had fallen asleep near the bathtub, his face on the cool tile as he slowly made his way to a standing position. He didn't understand why he was just waking up, did he faint? It was mid-day yesterday, so it could be the only reasonable explanation. Damn his head was killing him. He made his way to the sink and splashed cool water onto his face, before looking in the mirror. Shower. That's what he needed. A shower. He turned on the hot water, scrubbing away, Pinkao's words. It hurt. The words. The feeling. The everything. Why couldn't life be simple?

"_It's us humans who make it so damn difficult…"_

Is that really the case? If it were then…why make it difficult to begin with? Why would someone want to make your life…your very OWN life so difficult? Roy shook his head, flinging stray water to and fro.

"_If ya stop e'ry once and a while an' listen. You'll notice."_

Roy blinked a few times. Listen. That was one thing he was never good at—but listen to what? The water? His ragged breaths? His heart beat?

"_Don't think of anythin'. Don't question anythin'. Jus' look an' relax."_

Roy turned off the shower, making his way to the room to get dressed. He pushed away all his thoughts as he walked to the front yard. No clouds, singing birds, shinning sun. He sat down into the soft grass under a near tree, and looked. For a while, he stayed like that. Not thinking. Not questioning. Just looking, and relaxing./

A/N: Hey guys! Another monthly update from meh! So, how is everyone? I'm good! kinda...i guess...mehhh. Real life stuff. Anyhows, since i am a LITTLE dead of what to post, i posted this, so its kinda a filler/tie-inner thing. I WILL be taking requests of what I may think suit the story. ALSO! This story needs some cover art! I will be taking requests for cover art since this is the first part of the series i'm working on. (OMGEEZ YEAH ITS A SERIES) Sooooo, please, if you have requests leave them in the whatchamacallit and I hope to see you next month! Thanks! SORRY FOR THE SHORTNESS AS WELL!


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